I've come to a realization and I'm not exactly sure what to make of it yet. I think I'm beginning to care less about how much people perceive I care about them. I don't know if I'm making any sense by saying it that way but it's the only way I can think to say it at this point.
I guess I just want to be honest in everything I say to people. I used to want to be very politically correct and diplomatic but I think that's changing in me and I'm not sure why or when that transformation started taking place.
This transformation is especially obvious in the emails I've been writing to people lately. I'm so busy with the tasks I have to do at work such that email has really become something that I spend way too much time on. People ask questions that I think they really should be able to figure out the answer to, if they just think about it for a little bit. But it seems like they don't think about it before asking me and then I have to move away from what I'm doing and answer this question (that I think is a stupid question to ask in the first place). It's not that I don't want to be helpful. I just want people to think for themselves more than it seems like they want to.
Am I making any sense here? Somebody tell me what's going on? Am I becoming a cranky old man? I really want people to know that I care about them and I want to help them solve their problems but I don't want to beat around the bush either.
6 comments:
Figure it out for yourself.
I am becoming more of that way too. I applaud anonymous' answer, but would also point out that you can make sense AND be a cranky old man. Cranky old men sometimes make a whole lot of sense.
Thank you, anonymous, for your comment. Your statement is the embodiment of the independent American spirit. I am indeed trying to figure this out.
Thank you as well, Brian. I don't fear that I'm not making any sense with my new found succinctness. I just don't want people to be turned away by what might be perceived as rude or short-tempered. I guess I'm looking for balance in there somewhere. I know some cranky old men who do make a lot more sense than others who are not as cranky. The problem is that people are not nearly as inclined to listen to cranky old men. Even if you have something worthwhile to say, it's no good if nobody's going to listen.
I guess I can't agree with anonymous. I think the Lord uses things like this to help hone us into his likeness. Sometimes the only way we can see something inside us is when it seeps out of us in ways that aren't the norm. And the Lord never lets those kinds of things happen until we're ready to see them. These things can be both positive and negative. It could be that the Lord is showing you that honesty is always the best and it could be that he's also wanting to show you how to express it correctly through the trial and error of your attempts.
Your heart is not that of a "cranky old man" - I know that about you. It is one of wanting to show the heart of Jesus. If that wasn't true then this wouldn't be bothering you. You'd just go with it and not see it as an issue.
But he gives you grace and wants you to allow yourself the same as he continues to mold you into his likeness. He doesn't desire us to have an independent spirit although it is so human to have one. He will help you understand this and give you all that you need to see how he wants to use it in your life and spirit.
Hmm... You're "Agreeableness" is at 92% on Facebook. And the fact that it bothers you that you have to be slightly rude... or that you're worried that you'll be construed as rude (ha, i had to use that rhyme).... it means you're not rude.
It's when you stop caring about what the other person thinks.
Yer fine. You could even say, "here are five simple steps to solve your problem on your own next time." The words "simple," "Your problem," and "on your own" hopefully letting them know not to bother you.
Very encouraging and helpful. Thank you Carol and Kelli.
To Kelli's comment... People do love to be empowered, so that might just work.
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